The war between the states

Editor's Note: Commedienne Pam Stone writes her column for The Tryon Daily Bulletin twice each month from her office in the "Unabomber Shack" on her Gowensville farm. Want a chance to respond to this column? Go to Pam’s blog at www.tryondailybulletin.com.

No, not the Civil War but the sly little remarks those of us hear who happen to reside in South Carolina by those who live in North Carolina.

"I don't get it," mused one pal who is always making fun of my zip code. "Why didn't you buy property in North Carolina? South Carolina is just so backwards."

Now, them are fightin' words....

I believe my home state incorporates impressive locales such as Hilton Head and Charleston as well as Myrtle Beach. Oh, all right, North Myrtle Beach, although you could probably find someone up there to airbrush a license plate that reads "Travis and Amber," too. We also have some terrific lakes, Caesar's Head, Aiken, Camden, and of course, Dill's Recaps.

I originally bought land in South Carolina in 1986. About seven acres of rolling field off Motlow Creek. Nearly every building in Landrum was boarded up. It sat hunched, humiliated, while its popular sister to the north, Tryon, went about its well-heeled business. I bought land in South Carolina because it was dirt cheap, there were endless places to ride and property taxes were a joke. My favorite pastime was to wave my tax receipt in front of my friends in Los Angeles who were selling blood to pay the taxes for a one bedroom condo they had purchased in Santa Monica. My property taxes were slightly less than renting a video. I loved the mountain views from my little parcel, planned to build a traditional farmhouse and small barn. Later on, an offer by the adjacent neighbor was made on the land, I sold and bought the farm I now own. In the meantime, under the early guidance of Mayor Brannon, Landrum's foot slipped into the glass slipper and she turned into a cultured swan. Even 'Ripley's' couldn't believe within a handful of years one get a latte or Guinness on draft.

Don't think I'm blinded by love for my state, however. I certainly see the faults. Most radically: the quality of the roads. I often haul my young horse to a friend's in North Carolina to use their indoor arena and it's a sad commentary to report that, even as a woman, I need a 'cup' to survive the jarring, bone-shaking trip. I can only imagine what my horse is going through. Like waking from a bad dream, as soon as the "Entering North Carolina" sign appears, the road turns from the surface of the moon to chocolate velvet, beautifully surfaced, not a pot hole in sight. Then there are the beckoning calls from Saluda, Hendersonville and Asheville, Cashiers, Waynesville.... the list of enchanting mountain getaways are endless.

Perhaps the way to embrace the value of both states is not to contrast but to compare the similarities. You may have Hunting Country, we have Gowensville. You have Biltmore, we have that castle that's always for sale on Fairwinds Road. You have The Pinecrest Inn we have The Beacon...ha!

Gotcha!